Love Notes Left Behind

   I can't stop thinking about the story of a six year old girl, Elena, who died of  brain cancer. Before she died she hid love notes to her family all over her house- in books, drawers, and bags of Christmas decorations. She's been gone for two years and her family is still finding them. Her story has been published in a book called "Notes Left Behind", with all proceeds going to The Cure Starts Now, a research charity started by her parents. An article about her story can be found here.

As the parent of a child with cancer, this story touches me deeply. I can relate to much of what her family has been through. I believe there is no loss greater than that of your child. My heart aches for them.

We too experienced the horrors of chemotherapy with our son. I had a whole room in our house devoted to medical supplies. He was unable to eat for nearly a year, so he had to receive total parenteral nutrition through an I.V. I learned to mix his intravenous feeding solution and run the I.V. machine.

My son is still here, not because of medical treatment, but by the grace of God. The doctors told us he was going to die, took him off all treatment, and enrolled him in hospice. Instead of dying, he gradually got stronger and he is here today, nearly 20 years later.  But we did experience an unbearable loss when he suffered severe permanent brain damage after a whole-cell DPT vaccination.
And the possibility of his cancer returning, or a new one occurring as a result of all of the toxic chemo he received will never go away.

So I do as much as I can to prevent it. I am fanatical about using non-toxic natural household cleaners,
healthy personal care products, eating a mainly whole foods vegetarian diet, getting plenty of exercise, and praying.

We try to make the most of each day, because really, right now is all you have. And even though we all know it, each and every day we say I love you.

Elena's sweet notes are still saying I love you two years after she's gone. I can picture that beautiful soul creating them and hiding them, knowing they will give joy to those she loves in the future. It's both heartbreaking and joyous at the same time. I don't know if I could bear it.

Say a prayer for Elena's family, then go and hug your spouse and kids and tell them that you love them.


Edited to add: I am extremely thankful that my son is still here, so this post has been added to thankful thursdays at Welcome to the Nuthouse. Head over and tell what you are thankful for.